speed away, train..

I woke up early today, its a new beginning for me. No more lecture classes to attend but a more serious and important routine has replaced university that is work. I've never been fond of being late for anything, and work is no different. The train will be my legs and it will send me to where i wan to go. The breeze from the train passing me before it stopped by the station is new to me, its not like university anymore.. i dont see familiar faces anymore on this train filled with strangers. I better get going then. speed away train, let me be there early for action!


Its a great day today, the birds are singing, the warmth of the sun just nice, the coldness of the night still lingers in the morning breeze. Today will be my first day at work. I wonder how my colleagues will be... Will there be alot of handsome guys, will there be ladies of my age.. now that I have left university and have my first step taken in to the working world. I need to start dressing up and making up to usher this new beginning. Thats why i'm up early, to do all that but i fear i wont be ready anytime soon.. lets just pray i reach work JUST in time.. hehehe.. :p speed away my train.. dun make my first day be a late day~


At work the people were friendly enough. Maybe I made a good first impression in coming in before anyone did. I think I will keep this up.. Finally the long 8 hours has flew by and now i can go home to the comfort of my room.. i feel a tid sore all around.. but i know I'll get used to it.. I know i will.. The train is finally here to send me home, its kind of time wasting waiting for it to come.. Lets see.. which cart should i take.. Well the head of the train seems empty enough compared to the sardin packed carts behind it. Mayb cause less ppl want to walk so far infront just to get in.. but there is no seats left available.. Oh well, I'll just stan....... What is this sweet smell that tingles my nostrils.. I turn to meet the bearer of this enticing smell.. and there she stands, just by the door of the train... her skin was as fair as snow, her long black straight shiny hair like calm night, our eyes met and immediately i could feel my heart miss a few beats and hotness shot up to my cheeks.. Noticing that i was staring, i immediately turned but my clumsiness made me bumped onto a big burly indian man.. ashamed and overwhelmed by awkwardness, i apologised and stood by the opposite side of her in the train... Silently i peeked at her.. her eyes was big and shiny, she was looking through the train windows outside to the moving world... her tranquil look was so enchanting... the train stopped.. as the door opened she walked gracefully out... then it dawned upon me.. where am i?? Crap! i overshot my station while being bewitched by her beauty.. going out now will only make things worse if she notice me.. I think i should get out at the next station... But if i have to do this every day.. i will... :) speed away train, let time speed as fast as you so i can see her tommorow.


*puff* it was quite a day.. but my colleagues was wonderful.. i wonder if i can leave work everyday at the same time.. right at the stroke of 530pm.. then i will have more time for myself.. The train at this time is already packed.. i guess standing at the first cart is the best solution, it at least still have spaces to strecth. The city is such a busy place.. looking through the window of a moving train and watching the ppl below rushing around like ants going about their work, some heading home, some going for dates.. hmmm.. a date.. i wonder when i can get one in this busy city... the train stopped again, its kind of a waste of my time stopping through so many stations before it reached mine.. I wish it wud just send me straight home.. Hmmm... there is a guy staring at me.. i wonder is it because my dress had a smudge on it.. o is it my face? I confronted him by looking straight at him.. i though i saw him blushing but i guess i startled him by doing so.. he stumbled on an indian guy behind him while turning.. how clumsy is he.. hehehe.. oh well back to city watching.. As the train slowly sped away towards my station.. i notice through the reflection of the window that young man, which was staring at me just now is... staring at me again... He doesnt seem bad or pervertic.. he has a boyish look to him.. some what good looking i must say.. his features isnt rugged or manly.. a gentlemen look to him.. speed away train.. i'm getting tired already.. the train stopped as i wish for it to speed off, i was at my station already.. i wonder if that guy is going out at this station too... I guess not.. he is still standing there, must be staying somewhere after my station..

No more going back on the right time... it seems my company has just received a huge project that is going to make all of us do overtime for the next 3 months. Its my second day at work and i'm catching the 10pm train home already.. as i drag my already tired legs up to the train station, my heart was thinking if i could still catch a glimpse of the lady from yesterday.. But i know no matter how fast my legs take me to the station.. she was 5 hours from me already.. i guess this is where i will stop seeing that angel. The train arrived and to my suprise, its still filled with ppl.. a city will always b a city.. the ppl work from every hours to any hours.. i still chose the first cart not because it was emptier but i hoped to see her... As i step in... the sweet smell was not there any more.. sigh.. i know it was too good to be hoping i wud have a chance to see her.. as i position myself to grab the handle of the train, there she was hugging the pole of the train.. my heart again stopped.. as if time stopped.. she was still.. her body was tired and leaning on the pole for support.. her eyes drained.. but she was still so enchanting.. she shifted alot on the pole as if sending a msg out that the pole wasnt what she wanted to support her.. she looked up at me.. but this time my reaction was fast enough.. i immediately looked at my watch.. hehehe... i'm getting good at peeking at her.. hehe.. as i looked up again.. she was at her tired pose again...her sweet smell drifted over to my nose again.. intocixating me for another time and like poison that makes illusion in your mind, i started to imagine if i had the courage to know her.. wud i be so lucky to be the one supporting her instead of that cold hard pole... at that very instant i was envious with the pole.. praying to God to change me to the pole for just that few intances... speed away train please.. at your fastest speed.. speed away and for my love is tired.. speed away and take me home too, for she has made me drunk with her beauty..

My sweet dream of going home right on time has been shattered.. i've been assigned to a team with an important project that will last for at least 3 months... it seems i will have alot of time in the office than at home... I cant believe its already 9 plus in the night.. anymore darker and i might just take the taxi back home.. I am very tired already.. even before the train came.. i was 'fishing' on the bench while waiting for the train... without thinking my body instinctively walked towards the first cart and slumped on the pole.. throughout the journey i wasnt really awake.. but there was an instance i felt i was being watched.. i opened my eyes.. and there he was.. the boyish guy, he was acting to look at his watch.. but i caught his eyes before he managed to look down.. such a silly guy, he thought he could escape my eyes.. hehehe.. but i'm too tired to be exposing him.. speed away train... so that i wont look piggish in front of that boyish guy..

I've been enjoying life for the past month.. not because of the late hours, but because i get to smell the sweet fragrance from her, which was my reward after a long day of work and to see her everytime i go back at such a late hour was my most anticipated moment of the day... most of the time she looks tired.. but there were instances as if she knows that my heart skips a beat for her.. the way at times she looks at me.. like a small puppy inviting me to pet her.. but.. for a month already.. i havent choke up the bravery to even say hi, let alone pet her.. all i know what to do is blush and look down at my shoes... how stupid is that.. speed away train.. let her reach the safety of her home.. I have already made it a habit to send her off to her station.. i bet she wud be thinking that i stay at the next station.. but for her.. my destination will always be the next station after hers and risking to miss the last train is alright for me as long as i get to see her.

Maybe i'm thinking too much.. but this past one month, i feel happy and safe even going back at such a late hour after work. i know this sounds silly... without knowing the boyish guy, I feel safe with him on the train.. sometimes when i'm too tired, he would watch over me.. like a silent agreement he made to himself to protect me.. he will always be somewhere near me but never approaching.. at times when i still have the energy, i would be naughty.. looking at him with my big teary eyes.. making him blush and looking awkwardly at his shoes... heheh.. he is cute when i catch him looking at me.. speed away my train.. send boyish guy back home.. he stays further than me, its not safe for any1 to b out in the dark.

Like waking up from a dream, I stopped seeing her in the train for 2 month already.. this is really an impact to me.. also as suspected, my project got extended and now i have to work over time for another 3 months.. just my luck.. losing the angel that gave me strength is bad enough.. now extended project for another 3 months means my reserve energy would be drained dry.. sigh... i wish she would be there to see me again... at first i thought she was sick and have been absent for work for a few days... then i even tried leaving early from work to catch the 530pm train, thinking maybe her overtime work is done... I have even tried going through every cart.. and lastly... observing the ppl that leaves the train when it reaches her station... but not even a glimpse of her could be seen.. even her sweet smell has not surfaced for such a long time... my mind wonders where had she been? did she quit her job?? did something bad happened to her? speed away train.. there is no reason for me to stay on you for so long anymore.. let me go by the world in you...

As i prepared to leave the office for the train station, Melvin my colleague offered to send me back.. i considered my options and agreed that he could do so.. not because i'm lazy to walk but today was a heavy workload day and i needed to really get some sleep.. Melvin was humourous enough.. joking the whole way back.. when i got bac home.. i was.. not tired anymore.. too much laughing i guess... To my suprise the next morning he was waiting under my apartment to fetch me to work.. he said he was just staying nearby, a free ride.. y not? He continued to be my driver to work and from work for the next 2 months.. during that 2 months i often thought of the boyish guy on the train but often enough i was pulled back to the real world by Melvin's often lame jokes.. And on one fine sunny day in that 2 months, Melvin gave me my first bouquet of flowers and asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes........ After i finished the project i was teamed to, i was put into Melvin's team to handle another project for 3 months.. And this means i get to have free rides again.. hehe.. i don't need the train to speed away anymore..

On the fourth month of not seeing her, i routinely stepped in the first cart of the train. And to my amaze, that once so familiar sweet smell came rushing in to my nose as if 2 long time lovers rushing to hug each other. My head swive from one side to the other searching in the crowds to find her... and there she was.. wearing a floral dress.. she was as elegant as ever.. her innocent look staring blankly in to the space outside the train window.. as she turned and our eyes meet after so long... there was something wrong... the spark in her eyes was gone, the past in such situations she would be at her naughty self and teasing me with her eyes.. but as soon as she noticed she and i was staring, she turned away, her long hair swived with her head motion.. i wanted to ask what was wrong but who am i... a stranger to ask... she never moved from her position that was looking at the outside of the train through the mirror... speed away train.. let her go back and calm herself.. she left the cart and i took another train back from the next station.. when i pass her station.. i saw at the entrance of the station a dark figure hugging a lady in floral dress and a bouquet of flowers on the floor... i tried to walk to the end of the cart to catch more glimpse if that was my angel.. but the merciless train speed away... which left me there wondering... hoping it wasnt her...

Like they say... after 3 months of honey moon period, lovers' feelings will settle down and problems will arise... and it was true... Melvin was leaving the company to the overseas to work.. he knew it was happening but still he kept it from me... we started argueing and in a rage i rushed out of the company and took the train home.. i was drained.. i don't even have the strength to let my tears roll out.. he called.. but i just let the phone die off... and suddenly i felt a feeling that i havent been felt for a long time, a familiar figure standing at a familiar distance, i turned and there he was, the boyish guy, he looked mature... no.. not mature but drain.. as if something happened to him that took away the once eager, energetic and kiddish look... i turned away from him for i do not wish him to see me in a weak state.. along the journey, he was observing me on and off... i was looking at the reflection of the mirror at him.. like usual.. he never noticed.. i saw his concerned look.. silly guy.. u dun even noe me... speed away train.. let him leave and save his energy on himself and not concerning about me... as i leave the station.. another familiar figure stood at the entrance waiting for me... Melvin, with his bouquet of flowers. I vowed to myself not to be weaken.. He apologised and hand me the flower... i swung my hand and the flower made a dramatic fall to the floor.... He held fast my arm and explained full and long... and finally..he said.. he was not going anywhere and was staying for me... with those words.. my hostile eyes turned sheepish... he hugged me tightly... as the train from the opposite direction came.. speed away train... i guess i don't need you again to send me back...

After last nights incident it strenghtened my will to go and know her.. to be her friend.. to love her... I made a silent promise with my inner self I would do it... The time has come... the noisy-ness of the train engine was nothing compared to my beating heart... I stepped in.. and that sweet smell again enveloped my senses, making already chaos-ed me even more in a chaotic state. She was at her old place again... standing by the pole.. But this time... something was different... she wasnt leaning on the pole.. she was leaning on a guy.. her back was on his chest.. she was snuggling using the back of her head on his chest.. She noticed me as i enter.. i made a faint smile.. holding bac all the agony and sadness... my eyes was going to betray me.. i tried to stop looking while they were chatting.. But i couldnt.. as if my heart was forcing me to watch..to look at the chance i have wasted... Being idle and not doing anything, she wont be yours... thats what my heart was telling me... As if sensing my sourness, the guy put his arms around her waist, marking his territory known.. And that was the last i could bear.. i looked away...my hands was cold... Speed away train.. i begged of you.. take me away from this cart of sadness... When it reached my station.. i hesitated.. I mustn't let her know all this while i was staying a station before hers... please Mr. Train.. fly... fly away.. i can bear no longer to even glimpse at their happiness through the reflection of your windows...

Melvin's car broke down last night, and he had to take it to repairs... so i guess taking the train back today was a must... as i stand at my usual place by the pole, a hand placed firmly around my waist.. i was stunned... turning i saw Melvin.. he said it was a suprise and he didnt want me to take the train back alone... how sweet of him... The train stopped at the next station, and the boyish guy entered.. his eyes was locked at us... as if disbelieving.. or is it because he saw me snuggling Melvin.. heheh... He must be a conservative guy... being shy looking at loving couples.. but his eyes seems.. seems..to tell a different story... then Melvin ego-ly had his hands over my waist and that was the end of the eye contact with the boyish guy... I guess he was just too shy to see couples hug.. funnily, the whole journey he wasnt facing us at all.. my assumption must be right...

A missed chance can never b recovered... I will let it be.. after weeks of hurting and pondering where i did wrong.. I finally woke up and told myself... i should be wishing her well and not being sour.. Although i havent been seeing her on the train after that... i still wish her the best... i guess its best that way.. my path is the tracks of the train and hers the bustling roads and highways. Today is the last day of my project and after today i will be on vacation, and I have heard rumours that i will be transferred to HQ for a better position after i come back from my rest... If that was true, i will follow another route of the train and leaving behind all that has happened on the other route... As i stepped on the full cart at the first of the train for the last time... i checked the at the poles she used to stand.. she wasnt there... though in the air.. her smell still lingered.. i shook my head.. i must be imagining... speed away train... speed away to another new beginning.. I walked out of the cart when it stopped at my own station after not doing so for 6 months.. I greeted the station staffs with glee as after this 6 months of daily commuting, i have be friends with most of them.. As i walked up the hill heading to my apartment, which was also just beside the tracks of the train station. I looked down at the first cart, as the train started to move, hoping to catch her final glimpse through the train's windows... but i saw nothing, just an empty seat where no one wanted to seat on even though it there was still people standing... i carried on..

Melvin left after saying he won't go for the job... it was a lie.. he only delayed his departure.. but he still had to leave... i don't blame him.. a man's life resolve around his career... After he left, I've been taking the train back again.. most of the time i was taking the early train back... but today i guess i was bogged down with work.. and took the once routined train back.. To my suprise, i found a seat when i got in... I sat and was immediately thankful, because a mob of people rushed into the cart after i seated.. to think my 1st seat after 6 months of commuting.. as the train stopped at the next station, I saw a glimpse of a familiar figure came in.. I tried to change my angle but there was too many ppl in my way.. And as the train stopped over the other stations.. ppl got less and less...and finally i saw him.. the boyish guy.. looking out the window.. he seemed rejuvenated since the last time i saw him... as if he has let go something that was draining his energy.. Then on the station before mine... he went out... greeting the guards and the other staffs, as if he knew them for quite some time... But i thought he was staying one station after me... And at that very moment it dawned upon me... he wasnt shy seeing me and Melvin being a couple.. he was... mad at himself.. i missed out my silent prince... i have never thought of it that way.. such overwhelming thoughts swarmed over my mind and i accidently dropped my ticket I held on my hand.. i bend over to picked it up as the train started to move.. when i got up, he and his station was too far away from my view.....

Since then, I have been taking the train back, early or late, first cart to the last... but he seemed some how to have disappeared... everyday, the breeze from the train blew at my face, though i'm not new to this experience, it made my hair dance a sorrow dance, and the figure i once so familiar was no where near to be found............



NOTE: This is written for fun and not a true story of me or any1 i know.. I was given inspiration by one of my favourite singer's song, which is also being played on this site (ericcky.blogspot.com).

Of Babies' Names....

now.. alot of you must be thinking.. "y is Eric blogging about babies' names AGAIN!!! he must be very desparate.." well.. not really.. is just that.. IT seems.. My daughter's name, Chelsea, has given SOME misunderstanding to SOME1, tat because i like Chelsea Football Club, I call my kid Chelsea.. oh no no no... I've heard about Chelsea before i knew Chelsea FC.. so let me REITERATE that the name Chelsea is not because of Chelsea FC.. u must be asking.. since when eric care about ppl misunderstanding where the baby's name came from... well..if its some strangers o normal friends, I dun really mind.. its some1 close.. yes... u noe who u are... hehehehe..

Now toking about football clubs' names and babies' names... if i'm really a football freak (i'm jus a football fan..not yet a freak)... like i was saying..if i were a football freak... i wud call my baby boy's name Aston Chai (for Aston Villa)... Lampard Chai maybe??? hahaha... but speaking for a gud name.. it just occur to me.. another club's name is suitable to b my 2nd daughter's name.. hahaha.. There is this club is the English Championship side (one level below the English Premier League).. its called Sheffield Wednesday.. a club i used to b very fond of.. she can b called Wednesday Chai~~ ah~~~ such a sweet name.. Aries is another good name.. altho i mus admit Aries is a name that i fell in love with after playing Final Fantasy 7... hehehe... the name is from one of the character's name.. who sacrife herself for the guy she loved.. she was protrayed as a sweet and gentle girl in the game..

hmmmm... 3 daughters... means i'm going to have 3 heartbreaks when they get married.. i dun even noe if i can handle with one heartbreak.. wat more to say 3... and if 3 daughters means they all cant b manja babies.. if not i wud have to handle 4 (including there mum).. ahahahha...

I dunno about u all, but i kinda believe about the 4 elements that we are borned to... the elements which consists of Earth (Metal), Air (Wind), Fire and Water. Basically your elements can be linked with your horoscope.. like me.. a Gemini is a Wind... Aries is Fire etc... hmmm... my daughters must not be either Fire or Wind.. well.. mayb wind can.. but nor fire..

Fire stands for spontaneous and impulsive... not too good for a lady like girl (mayb its just contradicting with wat i wan).. hahaha.. I fear they might end up too guyish.. hahah.. As for the wind.. quick and animated is what i can say about them (i'm complimenting myself..hehehe..).. this i'm afraid they might be to flirtatous.. giv me more headaches.. haha... now water represents feeling types and are very sensitive. Which translates into... GIRLY GIRLY type... :) next is the EARTH type.. no need to describe.. we have a living example.. Eddie..:P.. yes.. a cow...er..i mean taurus is Earth..

Ha! i cant believe i've written sooo much..jus on daughters.. luckily i din drag the guys into it... yet... phew... this blog is making me lazy to post pictures.. hahah..i'll... leave it tml.. :p.. cheerS~

A storm StiRs~~

Hidden beneath Eric's skull, on the surface of Eric's cerebral cortex (brain).. volts of electricity rushes from the imaginative part of the right brain to the analytical part of the left brain... this jolts of current running from one end of Eric's brain to the other, are like lil spiders crawling around carrying information.

It has been awhile i must admit that my brain has been running at such a critical state, let alone to its full potential... I've always been under-using my brain.. and it too has been underperforming for the past few years... i guess its time to slowly start waking the sleeping giant.. the recent hive in activities of thoughts has been flooding my mine with all sorts of questions... questions from the creative, imaginative part towards the logical, analytical side, who is struggling to cope with its other counterpart's whys, hows, whos, whats, wheres and whens.

Deep in the brain, at its very core... I feel the witch's cauldron has started to boil.. the fires are lit and is getting bigger... slowly ingredients are being added in to the mixture.. brewing something.. brewing a plan mayb, a strategy... o mayb brewing a large enuf brainstorm to stir Eric to his very foundations.

I can feel a storm is coming in my head... i fear not this storm which brings strong winds... devastating lightnings and roaring thunders... for after the strom.. old tree of bad habits and thoughts will be swept away with their roots together by the wind... the jolts and shocks of the lightnings will restore my brain to its former glory or even more... and the thunders act as a role to herald a new age of critical thinking and passion for information has arrive..

cheers~!~

writting to dust off the dusts..

Like what the title suggest.. i'm writing to dust of the thick dust layers that has settled on my blog.. i've tonnes of pictures.. but its still in disarray.. I have pictures of my company dinner, my confirmation dinner.. my K session with my cute sis and a few more randoms.. its partly cause i'm starting to get busy in my studies.. and also.. i cant really bring my laptop into my office so freely anymore.. security has tighten due to a certain theft issue on a RM 20 plus thousand object.. which is for ur info not stolen by any of our technical side ppl.. none the less it has resulted in HQ sending a high ranking ex police officer, who is one of the leading investigators in our company if such things happen. We call this process DI (Domestic Investigation)

And for them to be Ex polices, i've heard their interrogation (is tat how u spell it?? lazy to check) method is to be as mean as possible and ask u to confess (even if it wasnt stolen o done by u) before even asking for your statement.. its a gruelling process.. i heard one of my senior engineer also got involved once about some misunderstanding on payroll (giving too much OT to ppl).. he got interrogated for 3 days in a roll... talking bout breaking your spirit...

well since after that theft problem.. we need to declare all bags and laptops when one comes in and goes out of the premise. sigh... its such a PITA (pain in the arse - boss taught me!!) I'll bring it on friday to write something and post up my company celebration dinner 1st... take care now!! cheers!!!